How exciting…feedback! I certainly wrote the first paragraph much easier than the second. In fact, I struggled so much with the second that I passed it to another artist originally who helped rewrite my convoluted ending for me. But yes, now that you say it…I only mention the work briefly at the end and I don’t say much about it. I like your suggestion of having a pen and paper handy when making the work too. I almost need to have a Metal Head Part III that helps me search for what I have discovered through the process.
What an interesting impact it would be if I switched the two first sentences. It is really nice to get an outside opinion.
Thanks for the feedback.