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    Posted by doug on October 27, 2017 at 8:41 am

    Here is my starting point with the elevator pitch. have always thought it is a great idea but never worked on one till now. Interested in your thoughts.
    Doug Freeman
    Elevator Pitch

    My work is about making a reason to go to the town square or the park – a touch stone and a meeting place.

    I make sculpture out of bronze that gives form to the local familiar or the spirit that energizes a place. Like The Lion’s Fountain in LA or The Seven Lucky Gods in Tokyo.

    Fountains that make people want to play.

    doug replied 7 years, 10 months ago 32 Members · 131 Replies
  • 131 Replies
  • tawelch

    Member
    October 27, 2017 at 11:02 pm

    I so like the ring of this Doug. Your word sculpture has me intrigued and knowing at the same time. A lovely balance that has me comfortably curious.

    • Deleted User

      Deleted User
      November 3, 2017 at 12:55 am

      YO.. There is something really calming about fountains.

      It is a goo d word as well as in the ‘fountain of youth’ so I get your playful scenario.

  • tawelch

    Member
    October 27, 2017 at 11:04 pm

    I am a landscape painter, passionate about exposing the mystery in an ordinary day.

    Terrill Welch

    • Kirsteen Titchener

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 8:25 am

      I really like this Terrill, it’s simple and not ‘artsty’ speak so great for everyone interested in art from any angle.  While simple I think I would feel intrigued, well no I do feel intrigued, to ask more or to look you up and see how you present that mystery.

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        November 4, 2017 at 12:42 pm

        Hi Terrill..should it not read ordinary “way”?

      • sherrihayter

        Member
        November 6, 2017 at 10:02 pm

        I do like your pitch but I’m not sure about the word “exposing” – having viewed your work, I don’t feel a resonance with this particular word…it almost feels too harsh or glaring.  It feels more like your work is an invitation to bear witness to the mystery of everyday life, to elevate those moment and not “expose” them (and of course, this could just simply be my own subjective bias with the connotations this word conjures of say a person exposing themselves!)

    • Beverley

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 9:40 am

      Hi Terrill,

      A simple, clear and inviting pitch. It works for me!

      Beverley

      • isamybella

        Member
        November 7, 2017 at 3:53 pm

        Ditto on “invitation.”

    • doug

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 1:28 pm

      Terrill

      Very nice ; “exposing the mystery in an ordinary day”

      Doug

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 3, 2017 at 5:37 am

      Terril, says it all 🙂

    • Wanda K. Tyner

      Member
      November 4, 2017 at 9:07 am

      Terrill,

      I really like your phrase – exposing the mystery in an ordinary day

  • Michelle Berlin

    Member
    October 29, 2017 at 9:26 am

    Hello,
    Here is my elevator pitch…
    “I work in clay and found objects to create OOAK shrines & shadow boxes filled with misfits, saints, jokers & fools” Does that sound intriguing? I want people to be curious enough to ask me questions about my work so I am trying to create a sentence that may open up a bit of back and forth dialogue.

    • Beverley

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 9:45 am

      Hi Michelle,

      This pitch is intriguing and I like it, but think I’d cut the OOAK – it sounds like jargon and will make the pitch more difficult to say in your 30 seconds in the elevator.

      Best wishes,

      Beverley

       

      • sherrihayter

        Member
        November 6, 2017 at 10:05 pm

        I agree with Beverly – this pitch is awesome with the omission of your acronym and it elicits curiosity beautifully!!!

    • Mark Butler

      Member
      November 3, 2017 at 2:30 am

      Hi Michelle,

      Had me intrigued enough to look for your work on a website – I can’t find one though?!

      Best wishes,

      Mark

  • TaLisa.

    Member
    October 29, 2017 at 3:26 pm

    Pitch:

    I paint symbols of strength, beauty, and diversity. My work is described as empowering, blissful, a smooth groove of neo-soul.

    • Beverley

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 9:38 am

      Really like that, TaLisa. Well done!

      Beverley

    • doug

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 1:23 pm

      TaLisa,

      I think you have something ; “a smooth groove of neo-soul” sounds good and seems to invite a reply.

      Doug

    • TaLisa.

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 5:00 pm

      thanks Beverley & Doug!

    • Memet Burnett

      Member
      November 11, 2017 at 12:18 am

      ditto on “smooth groove of neo-soul”– fun descriptor.

  • mijwallace

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 12:56 am

    Here’s a quick first attempt at the elevator pitch:

    My landscapes come from a deep desire to take the viewer to places they haven’t been, but would love to go to.

    Mark Wallace

    Terrill, your comment on exposing the mystery from the ordinary really strikes a cord

    • Beverley

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 9:47 am

      Nice pitch, Mark. It would definitely invite me to ask questions.

      Beverley

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 6:15 am

      I like it, Mike 🙂

    • Michal Tkachenko

      Member
      November 6, 2017 at 2:09 pm

      Mark,

      I agree, it is simple to say, sounds like ordinary speaking language and sounds interesting.

  • Beverley

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 9:29 am

    Here’s my attempt at an elevator pitch:

    My work’s about colour and texture on surfaces weathered by the passage of time. Through photos and and paintings I hope to share my delight in the small details of the visual world.

    (Am wondering whether I need both sentences? If only one, the first or the second?)

    • doug

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 1:19 pm

      Beverley

      I like the idea of one sentence that invites a question from the listener.

      Doug

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        November 3, 2017 at 1:16 am

        I am fully in agreement with Beverly

      • sherrihayter

        Member
        November 6, 2017 at 10:08 pm

        Beverly, I think the first sentence is great and a conversation would naturally lead to the expression of the salient points of your second sentence.

    • TaLisa.

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 5:01 pm

      Hi Beverley – I think the first sentence could stand alone.

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 5:53 am

      Beverley, I like it. I would move the “through photos and paintings” to the end of the second sentence, and remove the tentativeness. You do share your delight : )

    • Wanda K. Tyner

      Member
      November 4, 2017 at 9:08 am

      Beverly,

      I feel the first sentence works well on its own.

    • Memet Burnett

      Member
      November 11, 2017 at 12:24 am

      To Beverly- if going for one sentence, a suggestion:

      My photos and paintings depict the dance of colour and texture on surfaces weathered by time.

  • Beverley

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 9:34 am

    Hi Doug,

    From what you’ve submitted, I like:

    “I make sculpture out of bronze that gives form to the spirit that energises a place.”

    This may not give the full picture, but I think its mysteriousness would invite questions.

    Best wishes,

    Beverley

    • doug

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 1:16 pm

      Thank you Beverley that is helpful.

      Doug

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 5:54 am

      Hi Doug, I agree with Beverley.

  • mijwallace

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 2:53 pm

    Hi Beverley

    I particularly like your first line it makes me want to look at your work to see what that visual description actually looks like

    best wishes

    Mark

  • tawelch

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 4:36 pm

    Thanks everyone for the feedback! I seem to be limited to the general reply option on my iPad so sorry for not being able to respond individually. I have been meaning to log in from my laptop to see if that makes a difference but haven’t had a chance yet.

    Mark, I am drawn to what you are doing as well. There is so much power in noticing what is right in front of us.

    I really, really enjoy all of the elevator speeches. I almost tingle with curiosity Mark, Beverly, Doug, TaLisa and Michelle. Just what I think we want. 😉

    Michelle, I had to look up OOAK to figure out what you meant. Then I felt kind of silly – like in, “of course!” But I am not sure this is what you want your reader to do if this statement was written instead of said orally. So I second Beverly’s suggestion. I think the rest works well and you have my attention without the reference to one of a kind.  This could be a nice second information piece of information once you have your audience hooked and asking questions.

    I hope everyone is having as much fun with this as I am!

     

     

  • TaLisa.

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 5:03 pm

    Doug – i agree with others. love the sculpture line.

  • Helen Fraser

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 8:16 pm

    I have to say that I am finding this one hard…difficult to tie all the threads together – so here’s my first attempt…

    My art connects the past to the present in poetic ways that can lead to healing and change.

    Any feedback would be appreciated.  Thanks so much.

    • Michal Tkachenko

      Member
      October 30, 2017 at 10:24 pm

      I wonder if now is the time to pull out your psychoanalyst background and start by saying…As both a psychoanalyst and artist I am connecting the past and the present through symbol that can lead to healing and change.

      It is just a thought but that beginning would sure get me interested!

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 5:45 am

      I love it, Helen.

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        November 3, 2017 at 1:18 am

        I agree with Michal on this one. Spot on!

    • Kirsteen Titchener

      Member
      November 6, 2017 at 7:43 am

      Could you add in just a word or two what medium you use to do this? I’m intrigued and I love the rest of what you have written but I was wondering (without cheating and looking you up) how you do it 🙂

  • Michal Tkachenko

    Member
    October 30, 2017 at 10:17 pm

    I must be really behind in time zones. I could see all your elevator pitches going up but my masterclass wasn’t available until today!

    For my work in progress:

    “My current work combines the theory/notion of celebrity with the iconography of the saints on hand-made altar pieces.”

    (I was playing with whether to use the work theory or notion)

     

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 5:59 am

      Michal, I think you are spot-on.

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        November 3, 2017 at 1:13 am

        How about leave out theory/ notion and write ‘idea’  ?

    • Deleted User

      Deleted User
      November 3, 2017 at 8:31 pm

      i’ve always liked the word notion and in your case i think it fits perfectly

    • Michal Tkachenko

      Member
      November 6, 2017 at 2:05 pm

      Thanks. I like “notion” better as well. It also feels a bit more fantastical or whimsical than “idea”, which is what I am playing at.

    • Memet Burnett

      Member
      November 11, 2017 at 12:54 am

      To Michal:

      I am currently working on hand-made alter-pieces which combine the notion of celebrity with the iconagraphy of Saints.

      (like “notion”)

      Also wanted to say your suggestions to others have been spot on– you are skilled with words and clever at eeking out intended meaning.

       

  • mijwallace

    Member
    October 31, 2017 at 12:57 am

    Doug

    Really like the first line of your second statement It says everything about your work and makes me want to see it.

    Michal

    Really think your statement is great and prefer the word notion

    Helen,

    I agree with Michal, using psychoanalyst in your statement gives it deeper meaning

    enjoying this exercise certainly challenging to distill everything into one or two sentences 🙂

  • Leah

    Member
    October 31, 2017 at 2:54 pm

    Here’s my pitch:

    My oil paintings bring a fleeting magical moment of wildlife in nature to the heart of others.

     

    • martina.delange60

      Member
      November 2, 2017 at 6:12 am

      Leah, I love the content. The sentence might read more smoothly if you changed the order around:

      My oil paintings bring magical moments to the hearts of viewers by capturing a fleeting glimpse of wildlife in nature.

      • Deleted User

        Deleted User
        November 3, 2017 at 1:05 am

        I would suggest rearrange.

         

        My oil paintings bring to the hearts of others….

  • mijwallace

    Member
    November 1, 2017 at 12:06 am

    Nice pitch Leah

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